pms coming again - how great !
which, in other words, means i've been having quite alot of moodswings lately.
so what's new is, i opened facebook page yesterday. on the news feed, i saw HIS post, intro-ing about his car and stuff, oh btw, he's trying to sell off his vitara, please contact him if you're interested or blabla. so, i was saying.. the post. the sister 'liked' the link, the gf commented, and the sis commented too. 'wow, great mennn !' notice the spelling ? MEN ? ohokay. ==
im being a meanie, so what ? i went to his page and saw that he changed his status to being in a relationship with her, and i called him yesterday morning. said he was going kk today, ofcourse he didnt mention with who, but use your butt think also know la can ? i was sooooo... sad ? kinda ? or something like that . hmm , i hate what i was feeling and my eyes started to get teary, thought i was over it. then i came to realize that i was never really, i just kinda chose not to think about it and stuff. Or maybe i'm just jealous. BLABLABLA i dontknow la, whatever.
its shitty, and i almost tried to log in and change his status, but then i took a DEEP breath, and repeatedly told myself, ' i will not do this, i will not do this. ' and i didnt. :) proud of myself. maybe the old me would, but the new me is able to think rationally. i dont wanna be the crazy ex gf, that whenever he thinks about me, he'd be like 'phew, luckily we broke up... ' or stuff like that. he's trying to keep a distance, i can tell. i guess its better too, for the both of us, and his sister likes the new gf too. so.. sad la. but i'm okay. at least better.
he'll be picking me from the airport the day i arrive, well, supposedly. but now im having second thoughts. its so good that im not seeing him anymore, the day i called him ? the minute i heard his voice, i realized, i miss him, so so much . so maybe i shouldnt see him anymore, even in dec when i go back. maybe we should avoid seeing each other, calling, texting, be in contact and stuff . i don't wanna cry over this crap, miss him over nothing, i dont want my MAGICALLY LONG holiday to turn into a disaster, thanks. cos i know myself too well, if i see him, i might miss him afterwards. i might not be able to control the urge to see him. its good for the both of us, i dont wanna be his current relationship's problem. i know he's happy now, im kinda mad that he's happy, but on the good side, he found someone that supports him, and well, shares alot of things in common with him. ( that's what he's been wanting) seriously though, i think its kinda boring, you're dating someone who's just like you, (besides good-looking) its just like looking into a mirror and you'll get bored sooner or later. but, im just saying. hehs. *angelic smile* i cant say im better than her, all beings are made differently.
so i've made up my mind, to call him on the day he returns from his kk trip and tell him we'll not be meeting, until i can be completely calm about this. its not that im not, now, and things went pretty smooth during sept (my last visit back home). but, its still better anyways. just a pre-caution.
my bestie will be picking me uppppppp ! :D i just know it's going to be great !
i gotta feeling ~ lalalalalalala !
THANKYOU YOU, WENDYLIM ! <3
(oh you mean the double YOU ? i did it on purpose, you arse, dont judge my english even if you are better.)
im gonna be home in a week !
ilove singlelife.
i wont change it for anyone, at least not for now !
I SO LOVE LIFE !
AND I SO LOVE GOD !
i went to the orphanage today ! :D
its a charity thing our college is doing.
June Intake is in charge, some of us march intakes tagged along anyway, :D
at cheras,
we took the college bus. i sit there (as in, in the bus) , want sleep - cannot, cos my posture like awkward liddat, want sit properly - cannot also, reason, same as above, sweat somemore. so damn hot cos i was sitting at the window seat. got aircon la, but.. haiya, hard to say.
my posture awkward cos, we shared seats, 3 of us. can imagine ? squeeshy.
not very bad also la, but then, joanne very kasian. HAHAHA, cos she's the teeny-iest (tiny-est). [whichever la]
we saw one very cool punya kid. but he damn tiaokeh lah, HAHAHAHAA totally like, pissed joanne, actually quite embarrasing, cos she talked to him and he didnt even bother to make a reply. he just stared at her for awhile, then continue eating. funny lah ! the other one was better, he said he's name is DAVID BECKHAM, double !@#$%^&* then he said, nola, my name is daniel. i think they all quite smart leh, can speak 3 kind of language and they can juggle quite well, their english not broken ! well, not exactly la, like how we normally speak like, got abit singlish feeling. :D
overall, they're quite adorable, :)
and i wanna say..
i will NEVER ABANDON my kid.
got exceptions lah - if raped (CHOI x3)
i would definitely go for an abortion, and curse the person to hell with all my life. :) its just natural. if ermm, accidentally, in future la. i will keep the baby, whether or not the future BF wants it or not, its not like i would NEED you to yang wo. ofcourse, im still just saying. i wont cry anf beg you to let me have the baby and stuff, thats just all so dramatic, and 'dramatic' and 'me', we don't go together.
ILOVELIFE !
ILOVEGOD !
ILOVEMYFAMILY!
ILOVEMYFRIENDS, wendylim especially!
blablabla !
im out.
xoxo,
JennyB
