so many things to blog about, so many things i wanna share, yet i have no idea where to start from. i'll just blog randomly, whatever that comes popping into my head. :D
P/S : might bore you, NO PICS, [x] is right there!
i went movie-ing with a friend today at OU, Jennifer's body + PokerKing. I love watching movies, but i'm an anti-horror film person. So, never ask me out for a horror movie, cos you can never change my mind about saying NO. Ofcourse, there are times where i make exceptions, cos I wanna watch ? hahaha, with that special person of mine ofcourse, WL. <3 ohyeah, and him, but there's no more him now, whatever !
I find Jennifer's Body, ermm. not THAT boring, excuse me, this is from my perspective, so don't start. TQ ! cos i've been getting like, alot of negative comments for this movie . kinda pointless abit. but everyone wants to watch lah, and the reason ? you know. *winks* Poker King, erm, funny LORH. as usual, Louis Koo. :) i love HK comedies ! YAY !
but the shitty thing is, im itching all over as of now, and i do NOT know why . prolly allergic to some stupid thang, and idk what . so, *scratch scratch scratch* like mosquito bites all over. GAHHHH ! SIEN.
So, recently, some arrogant guy my friends have been admiring thought i like him just cos i added him on FB, he GUESSED that COS HOR, MY FRIENDS DID NOT ADD HIM. HELLO?! means every girl that adds you must like you one la is it? and you blind kali, one of them DID actually add you lorh, but whatever, i don't care la. cos i really don't, and IT IS NOT ME, I REPEAT NOT MEEEEE. PFFFTT. its kinda like a reflex that i pulled snowfish to cover me when i saw him after the movie awhile ago. wtf, thanks to you making me paiseh .
!@#$%^&*
oh oh ! i saw alot of clothes that i wanna buy, and books, and shoes, and bags, and phone. == FFFFF. need $, cutting down on food, more on luxury babeh. :D urghh, and i hate ME for being such a spendthrift, i always give myself reasons for over-spending. like - life is short, if you don't get it today, WHEN WILL YOU? so, i get THEM. it's crappy i know. but how lerh? IDONTKNOW MAN!
we're having three more weeks of class and im gonna be home! been homesick lately, i kept dreaming that i was at home, i was even smiling when i opened my eyes wtf, only to find myself in the hostel room still. sweet sweet dream. it's not like i have big plans during the coming month of break, but, it's okay to stay home and go nowhere, i was desperate the last time i went home cos i was just too depressed. but i'm fine now, so so much better ! ofcourse, affected in some ways, good and bad.
The good is - i don't loathe him, not one bit. He may have been cheating even before he first confessed, but he's a really good guy, shaddup there, you don't know nothing, you can't judge. he's the best there ever was, irreplaceable. All i can say is, goodluck to the current gf, and goodchoice ! :) there may never be someone like him, or maybe there is ? prolly RARE anyways, and, one of a kind.
` i'm no longer missing him as much as i did before. i do still, sometimes. and y'know what the best part is ? i remember only the best of him. there's no more regrets, since the day he told me he missed me too, and asked why i just had to leave ? this scene of him cheating has been playing in my head a million times before when i was away, but i didn't really wanna know if he did, cos i had too much biz going on, so busy sometimes i forget to text nor call, it worries him. i prolly havent been a good gf too, so, im happy he has someone for him now.
sorry i wasn't able to give you my full attention since the day i left. you tried hard to understand, i know. i tried hard too, but i guess 'trying' wasn't working.
YOU WILL FOREVER BE REMEMBERED. <3
The bad - I'm so afraid of falling for someone right now. self-protection? maybe. haha, but K is no longer a secret. no, we havent been having any improvements. we're both too selfish i guess. none of us wants to get serious. and im guessing it would be better this way, cos all we need is a sense of security, and someone to really sweet with ? i like him cos he's just nice like that. i'm used to him, he's my bad habit now. love? no. I love everyone, i can say it, but be serious and say it to one guy? it will NEVER happen again. i'm sorry, i can't love. i lost the courage, and the faith.. so don't lie, don't tell me bullshit like 'together forever' or shit like that. you know pretty well it would never happen. :D tQ. stop judging me at this moment and look at yourself. you believe what he/she says? its up to you. i don't. this is the side effect, see? sarcastic huh?
` at times, ofcourse, i envy couples, and i wish i could be the girls that i've seen, trying to believe that beautiful, beautiful lie. But I just can't anymore. I'm sorry. Mr Right will come you say ? we'll see about that.
Single is not a bad thing, i love freedom, we had our own things to keep us occupied, we gave each other space, and we trusted each other - that's why we walked hand in hand for 3years. not after i left ofcourse. well, things change, people change.
I can't pay full attention and i hate control freaks. I hate people who complains alot yet they don't even do anything about it, tell you what, go kill yourself. OOPS, just kidding. :)
don't whine if you can do something bout it. not exactly perfect but i havn't been whining ALOT like i used to. He changed me, into a better person. :) i respect him, very very much.
Oh, and i haven't been crapping alot like how i used to. getting colder, the friends say. i still do, sometimes, but not as much, sometimes i dont even answer nor look at them. and its prolly pissing them off ? my apologies. hahahaha, way too cool for you. lol! kidding la.
just havne't been having much to talk about, it's like i no longer find it interesting to tell people stuff cos you know, if you haven't noticed, MOST people would rather talk about themselves than listen, and its like they're just talking to themselves, they dont even bother if you're listening. so i don't even bother looking at them, nor make a reply. it's just plain boring, and they're like so long-winded, they can go on and on and on for hours, and you won't even see a point in all that crap he/she has just said. so, i'd REALLY rather you not talk at all.
ignore chats, smses, calls sometimes. i don't really feel like talking much, especially these few days, nono, pms is wayyyyy over! i rarely call home nor text my bestfriend anymore. i still do, sometimes, only to whine to her, but i decided to quit being one of those losers. having alot on my mind these days, and no, i do not need anyone to talk to, they wont understand and i really really malas explain. would rather have them figured out on my own. thanks for your concern.
oh, looking for a new place to stay, moving out with harn, 70% possibility of it happening, till i see the room tomorrow, know the rental, deposit, the new housemates and stuff. will have all stuff sorted out tomorrow. need a new environment, just to check my adaptability! :D
A2 syllabus is starting, hopefully full concentration will be ON. Can't afford anymore DISTRACTIONS. so, shoo shoo, kacaus!
OH, ILOVELIFE.
OH, ILOVEGOD.
(hynotizing myself)
OH, ILOVECOLLEGE
OH, ILOVEMYFRIENDS
(still hypnotizing)
OH, ILOVEMOM&DAD
OH, ILOVE EVERYTHING.
(hypnotism complete)
gotta ciao now. toodles!
xoxo,
JennyB
